How to Stop Other People From Spending Your Money

8How many times have you heard the phrase, “I know you have it!” Maybe we said it to our parents when we were younger, or maybe friends or family have said it to us. Regardless of the situation, someone else is counting another person’s pockets!

It’s hard enough to manage our own money without falling into the temptation of self-sabotage by engaging in unnecessary or wasteful spending, but it’s even harder when someone else is counting our money! No wonder why people don’t like to talk about their salary! The difficult part is that the person counting our pockets is generally someone close to us. It’s probably a person to whom we have a hard time saying no.

I was inspired to write this article, because I hear so many women telling me that it is hard for them to achieve their financial goals because someone is always asking them for a loan, a contribution to a gift, or even to pay their bills. Earlier today, I heard another example. A barista told me that her mom wanted to take her son on a trip. Of course, the mom wanted her to come as we’ll. She told her mom, that she didn’t have the money to go, and her mother told her, “I know you have the money, because this is your ‘free’ check.” The reference to ‘free check’ meant that this was not the check that covered the bills. She told her mother that she was planning to use the money to do something nice for her birthday and also trying to save. Her mother ignored the comments and still asked her to come along. This wasn’t the first time that her mother used her knowledge of her pay periods to ask her to spend money. There was another instance where her mom went out and bought gifts without her knowledge or consent and then demanded that she pay half! She was conflicted because she didn’t want to say no to her mom, but yet she didn’t have the extra money to spend. Sadly, stories like this are far from uncommon.

In order to help to reduce the strain on our finances from outside parties, it is important to understand a few strategies that we can employ to get other people out of our pockets.

  1. Ask for an accountability buddy. Tell the person who is guilty of pressuring you to spend money about your financial goals. Ask them to hold you accountable for staying on track and managing your spending. If the person is supposed to be keeping you accountable, it will (1) cause them to re-think the request and (2) makes it easier for you to tell them when they are being a sabotaging enabler.
  2. The word “No” is a complete sentence. Many times we are scared to say no, because we fear what they other person will say. If you can’t spend the money, don’t feel like you need to make excuses or justify your decision. Simply say “no”and stand firm in your decision.
  3. Don’t talk about your pay structure and income. It’s hard for people to try to spend your money if they don’t know how much you make. It’s ok to talk freely about money goals to people who are helping you to make some changes to your financial life, but you don’t have to tell everyone. The fewer spenders in your pockets the better.

Let me know how you plan to implement these strategies! I would love to hear from you, about how you plan to stop other people from spending your hard-earned money!

Aisha Taylor is a #1 Amazon Best Selling Author of the book “5+5 FNPhenomenal Ways to Save $100 This Week Without Killing Your Lifestyle”, and the Founder of FNPhenomenal (Frugal –n- Phenomenal). FNPhenomenal helps women to break the vicious cycle of making money, but not keeping it. FNPhenomenal provides education about money management, empowers women to take control of their lives, develop a healthier relationship with money, and pursue being phenomenal.

Visit Aisha online at www.FNPhenomenal.com

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If this post really resonated with you and you want to transform how you feel and think about money so you can live your best life, consider money therapy.   

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