Randomly, I got a text the other day from a platonic male friend. He wanted to check in and see how I was doing. A few texts in he told me that he thought I was extremely intelligent, hard working and deserving of every thing I set my mind to and other heart warming things.
Nothing prompted this text, and it didn’t end with the ever annoying, “Wyd? Can I come over?” that single girls are all-too familiar with. This has been happening a lot lately. I’ve even gotten a text from a man who is romantically interested in me telling me that he just woke up appreciating my spirit and thanked me for the influence I’ve had in his life thus far (how sweet is that?). I’ve had equally as loving communication from female friends too.
There’s a secret as to why I’ve been the recipient of so much love…
For the past few months I’ve been completely in love with myself. I’ve been loving me as much as I’ve ever wanted any man to love me—complete with the, “You’re so damn cute….girl, I love your eyes…,” and not being able to get enough of my dimpled smile, intellectual discourse and crazy sense of humor. (Ugh! Get a room already!)
I write to you today to invite you to join me on Cloud Nine, Anywhere, USA.
I’ve always been someone confident in my abilities and in general haven’t had many issues in the area of self-esteem. However, I’ve had some issues with self-worth (there’s a difference). Earlier on I had very few individuals who mirrored my worth to me and me aware of the value I had in someone’s life. As a consequence, I’ve often gotten it twisted and thought I was lucky to have this one or that one in my life, without also realizing that in fact, they were probably more lucky to have me there.
When you don’t realize your worth, you put up with a lot and often accept less than what is due.
After a dissolved marriage and dating for the past 6 years without anything materializing, I got to the place where I really had to ask myself, “What’s so wrong with being single?” I came to the conclusion that absolutely nothing was wrong with it. With that I stopped wanting to be coupled and began taking a vested interest in myself. Things around me began to change and I became the recipient of love wherever I went and in whatever I did.
Though I make reference to my being single, this applies to those that are coupled too! If you want to see a change in how your partner loves you, go ahead and love yourself more than you ever have and see what a difference it makes.
In traditional wedding vows we say, “I… take you… to be my… to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.”
However lovely the sentiments, we shouldn’t be promising anyone this until we’ve promised it to ourselves first.
I woke up this morning and I filled in the above pledge with my own name, “I, Norissa…”
I added personal things as well—promising to take care of my body, to consider my own well being and when given the chance to love someone or myself more, that I would choose me.
What pledges do you want to make to your self? Do it loud. Do it proud. Do it in our comment section, below!
[info_box type=”alert_box”]If you want to practice self-care, you have to care for your finances. My book, The Happy Finances Challenge, is designed to help you learn to make money decisions that will lead to long-term financial happiness in just 42 days. [/info_box]